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THE ROSE AND THE RING -
THE ROSE AND THE RING - WILLIAM MAKEPEACE THACKERAY PRELUDE
It happened that the undersigned spent the last Christmas season
in a foreign city where there were many English children.
In that city if you wanted to give a child's party you could
not even get a magic-lantern or buy Twelfth-Night
characters--those funny painted pictures of the King the Queen
the Lover the Lady the Dandy the Captain and so on-- with
which our young ones are wont to recreate themselves at this
festive time.
My friend Miss Bunch who was governess of a large family that
lived in the Piano Nobile of the house inhabited by myself and my
young charges (it was the Palazzo Poniatowski at Rome and
Messrs. Spillmann two of the best pastrycooks in Christendom
have their shop on the ground floor): Miss Bunch I say begged
me to draw a set of Twelfth-Night characters for the amusement of
our young people.
She is a lady of great fancy and droll imagination and having
looked at the characters she and I composed a history about
them which was recited to the little folks at night and served
as our FIRESIDE PANTOMIME.
Our juvenile audience was amused by the adventures of Giglio and
Bulbo Rosalba and Angelica. I am bound to say the fate of the
Hall Porter created a considerable sensation; and the wrath of
Countess Gruffanuff was received with extreme pleasure.
If these children are pleased thought I why should not others
be amused also? In a few days Dr. Birch's young friends will be
expected to reassemble at Rodwell Regis where they will learn
everything that is useful and under the eyes of careful ushers
continue the business of their little lives.
But in the meanwhile and for a brief holiday let us laugh and
be as pleasant as we can. And you elder folk--a little joking
and dancing and fooling will do even you no harm. The author
wishes you a merry Christmas and welcomes you to the Fireside
Pantomime.
W. M. THACKERAY. December 1854.
CONTENTS
I. SHOWS HOW THE ROYAL FAMILY SATE DOWN TO BREAKFAST
II. HOW KING VALOROSO GOT THE CROWN AND PRINCE GIGLIO WENT
WITHOUT
III. TELLS WHO THE FAIRY BLACKSTICK WAS AND WHO WERE EVER SO
MANY GRAND PERSONAGES BESIDES
IV. HOW BLACKSTICK WAS NOT ASKED TO THE PRINCESS ANGELICA'S
CHRISTENING
V. HOW PRINCESS ANGELICA TOOK A LITTLE MAID
VI. HOW PRINCE GIGLIO BEHAVED HIMSELF
VII. HOW GIGLIO AND ANGELICA HAD A QUARREL
VIII. HOW GRUFFANUFF PICKED THE FAIRY RING UP AND PRINCE BULBO
CAME TO COURT
IX. HOW BETSINDA GOT THE WARMING-PAN
X. HOW KING VALOROSO WAS IN A DREADFUL PASSION
XI. WHAT GRUFFANUFF DID TO GIGLIO AND BETSINDA
XII. HOW BETSINDA FLED AND WHAT BECAME OF HER
XIII. HOW QUEEN ROSALBA CAME TO THE CASTLE OF THE BOLD COUNT
HOGGINARMO
XIV. WHAT BECAME OF GIGLIO
XV. WE RETURN TO ROSALBA
XVI. HOW HEDZOFF RODE BACK AGAIN TO KING GIGLIO
XVII. HOW A TREMENDOUS BATTLE TOOK PLACE AND WHO WON IT
XVIII. HOW THEY ALL JOURNEYED BACK TO THE CAPITAL
XIX. AND NOW WE COME TO THE LAST SCENE IN THE PANTOMIME
THE ROSE AND THE RING
I. SHOWS HOW THE ROYAL FAMILY SATE DOWN TO BREAKFAST
This is Valoroso XXIV. King of Paflagonia seated with his Queen
and only child at their royal breakfast-table and receiving the
letter which announces to His Majesty a proposed visit from
Prince Bulbo heir of Padella reigning King of Crim Tartary.
Remark the delight upon the monarch's royal features. He is so
absorbed in the perusal of the King of Crim Tartary's letter
that he allows his eggs to get cold and leaves his august
muffins untasted.
'What! that wicked brave delightful Prince Bulbo!' cries
Princess Angelica; 'so handsome so accomplished so witty--the
conqueror of Rimbombamento where he slew ten thousand giants!'
'Who told you of him my dear?' asks His Majesty.
'A little bird' says Angelica.
'Poor Giglio!' says mamma pouring out the tea.
'Bother Giglio!' cries Angelica tossing up her head which
rustled with a thousand curl-papers.
'I wish' growls the King--'I wish Giglio was. . .'
'Was better? Yes dear he is better' says the Queen.
'Angelica's little maid Betsinda told me so when she came to my
room this morning with my early tea.'
'You are always drinking tea' said the monarch with a scowl.
'It is better than drinking port or brandy and water;' replies
Her Majesty.
'Well well my dear I only said you were fond of drinking tea'
said the King of Paflagonia with an effort as if to command his
temper. 'Angelica! I hope you have plenty of new dresses; your
milliners' bills are long enough. My dear Queen you must see
and have some parties. I prefer dinners but of course you will
be for balls. Your everlasting blue velvet quite tires me: and
my love I should like you to have a new necklace. Order one.
Not more than a hundred or a hundred and fifty thousand pounds.'
'And Giglio dear?' says the Queen.
'GIGLIO MAY GO TO THE--'
'Oh sir' screams Her Majesty. 'Your own nephew! our late
King's only son.'
'Giglio may go to the tailor's and order the bills to be sent in
to Glumboso to pay. Confound him! I mean bless his dear heart.
He need want for nothing; give him a couple of guineas for
pocket-money my dear; and you may as well order yourself
bracelets while you are about the necklace Mrs. V.'
Her Majesty or MRS. V. as the monarch facetiously called her
(for even royalty will have its sport and this august family
were very much attached) embraced her husband and twining her
arm round her daughter's waist they quitted the breakfast-room
in order to make all things ready for the princely stranger.
When they were gone the smile that had lighted up the eyes of
the HUSBAND and FATHER fled--the pride of the KING fled--the MAN
was alone. Had I the pen of a G. P. R. James I would describe
Valoroso's torments in the choicest language; in which I would
also depict his flashing eye his distended nostril--his
dressing-gown pocket-handkerchief and boots. But I need not
say I have NOT the pen of that novelist; suffice it to say
Valoroso was alone.
He rushed to the cupboard seizing from the table one of the many
egg-cups with which his princely board was served for the matin
meal drew out a bottle of right Nantz or Cognac filled and
emptied the cup several times and laid it down with a hoarse
'Ha ha ha! now Valoroso is a man again!'
'But oh!' he went on (still sipping I am sorry to say) 'ere I
was a king I needed not this intoxicating draught; once I
detested the hot brandy wine and quaffed no other fount but
nature's rill. It dashes not more quickly o'er the rocks than I
did as with blunderbuss in hand I brushed away the early
morning dew and shot the partridge snipe or antlered deer!
Ah! well may England's dramatist remark "Uneasy lies the head
that wears a crown!" Why did I steal my nephew's my young
Giglio's--? Steal! said I? no no no not steal not steal.
Let me withdraw that odious expression. I took and on my manly
head I set the royal crown of Paflagonia; I took and with my
royal arm I wield the sceptral rod of Paflagonia; I took and in
my outstretched hand I hold the royal orb of Paflagonia! Could
a poor boy a snivelling drivelling boy--was in his nurse's arms
but yesterday and cried for sugarplums and puled for pap--bear
up the awful weight of crown orb sceptre? gird on the sword my
royal fathers wore and meet in fight the tough Crimean foe?'
And then the monarch went on to argue in his own mind (though we
need not say that blank verse is not argument) that what he had
got it was his duty to keep and that if at one time he had
entertained ideas of a certain restitution which shall be
nameless the prospect by a CERTAIN MARRIAGE of uniting two
crowns and two nations which had been engaged in bloody and
expensive wars as the Paflagonians and the Crimeans had been
put the idea of Giglio's restoration to the throne out of the
question: nay were his own brother King Savio alive he would
certainly will the crown from his own son in order to bring about
such a desirable union.
Thus easily do we deceive ourselves! Thus do we fancy what we
wish is right! The King took courage read the papers finished
his muffins and eggs and rang the bell for his Prime Minister.
The Queen after thinking whether she should go up and see
Giglio who had been sick thought 'Not now. Business first;
pleasure afterwards. I will go and see dear Giglio this
afternoon; and now I will drive to the jeweller's to look for
the necklace and bracelets.' The Princess went up into her own
room and made Betsinda her maid bring out all her dresses; and
as for Giglio they forgot him as much as I forget what I had for
dinner last Tuesday twelve-month.
II. HOW KING VALOROSO GOT THE CROWN AND PRINCE GIGLIO WENT
WITHOUT
Paflagonia ten or twenty thousand years ago appears to have
been one of those kingdoms where the laws of succession were not
settled; for when King Savio died leaving his brother Regent of
the kingdom and guardian of Savio's orphan infant this
unfaithful regent took no sort of regard of the late monarch's
will; had himself proclaimed sovereign of Paflagonia under the
title of King Valoroso XXIV. had a most splendid coronation and
ordered all the nobles of the kingdom to pay him homage. So long
as Valoroso gave them plenty of balls at Court plenty of money
and lucrative places the Paflagonian nobility did not care who
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